Asking yourself some questions before the wedding is essential if you want to avoid any misunderstandings later. Otherwise, we may be doomed to remain in a failed, unhappy marriage or divorce.
People in love are often blindly focused on themselves, but it is worth allowing the voice of reason and knowing the answers to these seven questions before you say “yes.”
We have prepared a list of questions that are worth asking your partner before the wedding. Of course, nothing stops you from discussing these issues at the beginning of the relationship. The sooner the better. Start by considering these issues in your head. It is worth knowing what we want and what we expect. This makes life easier in the relationship for both parties – you and your partner.
1. How do you imagine our ideal life together?
Of course, we know that everything will never be exactly as we would like it to be. However, this question is about learning about the other person’s preferences and dreams. It is best if they are consistent with ours or at least do not conflict.
Sometimes, it’s worth letting your imagination run wild and sharing your idea of a perfect relationship. This says a lot about a person and makes it easier to live together and face reality. It’s good to know what our partner thinks his dream life looks like.
2. How will we share expenses?
Some people have a joint account and contribute half of everything. There are also relationships in which there is no clear division, sometimes one pays, sometimes the other. The important thing is that the established system suits both people and is not harmful to anyone.
If one of them earns much less, it is difficult to expect them to contribute the same amount to common expenses. It is worth considering these issues if we are planning a life together.
3. Do you want to have children and how many?
Some people, when they get married, already think about having children. There are also those for whom it is too early. However, talking about this topic should not be postponed. It’s best to establish this right away to avoid misunderstandings later. Children are an issue on which there is no compromise. Either one person gives in and suffers, or the couple must break up. There is no other option, so be sure to clarify this issue before the sacramental “yes.”
4. What does betrayal mean to you?
Such things should be agreed at the beginning of the relationship, but if you haven’t done it yet, catch up before the wedding. This will help you avoid misunderstandings. The concept of betrayal is often a relative matter. What may not be inappropriate for one person may be unacceptable for another.
5. Do you have (or have you had) any debts or financial obligations?
It’s not a very romantic question, but it’s better to know than to be surprised later. When you get involved with someone, you have the right to such information, because their finances are no longer just their business. You will also feel the effects of his previous decisions. You should know what you’re signing up for. Of course, financial obligations are not a reason to write someone off, but hiding it is another matter.
6. Do you have (or have you had) any problems with the law?
Most of us have probably had some fines or youthful misdeeds on our record. These are often harmless little things, but each of us should decide what we can accept and what we cannot. This is quite a difficult question, but it is worth persevering and asking it. If only to see how your partner will react to them.
7. Why do you want to get married to me and what do you expect in this new stage of life?
Contrary to appearances, the answer to this question is not so obvious. For some, marriage is just a piece of paper that doesn’t actually change anything, but there are people who have a quite clear vision of life after marriage. It’s worth talking it through to make sure you have a similar approach and expectations.
When asking questions, it is worth paying attention not only to what your partner says, but also to how he or she responds to the question. The reaction itself can say a lot about his approach to these important issues.